Grumpy Notes on Rabby Burns (2005)

What is the deal with these writers?

Whenever I hear or think about this or that famous male writer having this or that affair or catching syphilis or whatever, I get a terrible choking feeling of claustrophobia for the women in their lives. The sluts and whores were available to them, as were their own chaste wives (and sometimes sisters)--the men could be sexual or chaste in their relationships as they chose--but women were absolutely one or the other, and once the line was crossed there was no going back. Neither slut nor pure woman was educated, owned so much as her own clothing. Poor and ignorant no matter the wealth, education, and power of their husbands or patrons, they were doomed to think ignorant, restricted thoughts and live ignorant, restricted, dependent, parasitic lives, until brought down by disease or childbirth.

John says maybe the women didn't feel that way. And there may be modern women who would consider my life chokingly claustrophobic. It is true that I have a strong, almost preconscious conservative bent, which I believe has to do biologically with having and raising children. To attach to one man, stay with him, raise his children is good. Is enough. When the exclusive relationship goes both ways. It's thinking about a woman's exclusive relationship with a promiscuous man that makes me crazy.